In our day to day lives, we are bound to encounter hurtful experiences, some of which linger on our
minds and hearts for a long time because of their magnitude. Sometimes, even though we may know
that it benefits us to forgive, we struggle to let go of the pain. We feel justified to hold on to bitterness
and want so badly for our offenders to be punished. That was me three years ago but I chose to forgive
and let go. I’m forever grateful that I was courageous enough to make this life changing choice.
Let’s look at forgiveness. Why should we consider it as an option?
What is forgiveness?
Forgiveness is a transformative act that can bring about profound healing and inner peace. It is the
conscious choice to release feelings of resentment, anger and vengeance towards someone who has
offended us.
We choose to replace these negative emotions with compassion, understanding and love.
While forgiveness may seem difficult and at times impossible, it is an essential part of our inner healing
process and has numerous benefits on our mental, emotional and physical well-being.
Understanding forgiveness
Most people think that forgiveness is about condoning and excusing the wrong actions of others. On the
contrary, it’s about freeing ourselves from the burden of carrying around negative emotions and
allowing ourselves to move forward with our lives.
Forgiveness does not necessarily mean reconciling with our offender or forgetting what happened. Rather, it is letting go of the emotional attachment to the past and choosing to enjoy our present and create our desired future.
What will you gain if you choose to forgive?
1. Emotional healing –
Holding on to pain and resentment leads to increased stress, anxiety and
can lead to depression. Practicing forgiveness allows us to experience emotional relief and a
greater sense of peace.
2. Improves relationships –
Forgiveness helps to repair and strengthen damaged relationships.
When we choose to let go of the past grievances, we create healthier and more positive
connections.
3. Physical health –
I personally suffered from very bad acne and painful sores on my feet. I spent
money on facial cleansers, toners and moisturizers but they were not helping. I was trying to
heal from without while all that time, it’s my inner world that needed healing.
After signing up and going through my forgiveness and healing coaching program, I finally chose to forgive and
the acne and sores healed completely!
I know people who have been cured from chronic
illnesses just by forgiving. Forgiveness reduces stress, lowers blood pressure and generally
boosts our immune system.
4. Personal growth –
Forgiveness is a sign of strength and maturity. We get a chance to learn from
our past experiences, develop greater self-awareness and cultivate compassion and empathy
towards others.
How do you begin your forgiveness journey?
1. Acknowledge your hurt –
It’s important to acknowledge and validate feelings of anger, hurt and
betrayal. Allow yourself to feel these emotions without judgement or trying to bury them.
2. Understand the situation –
This might sound absurd but it is important to try to understand
your offender’s perspective and the circumstances that led to their actions. This doesn’t mean
you that you agree with or excuse their behavior but understanding can help you cultivate
empathy and compassion.
3. Let go of resentment –
Choose to let go of negative emotions and the resentment you have
been holding onto. This is a gradual process that may take time and requires you to be patient
with yourself. It’s also important to seek help in this.
4. Focus on self-care –
Engage in self-care activities such as meditation, journaling, physical
exercise, nature walks among others. These are activities that bring you joy and fulfilment.
5. Practice gratitude –
Journaling of gratitude come in so handy. This helps you to focus on
positive aspects of your life and lessons you have learnt from your experiences. This helps to
pick the silver from the mud. It’s important to focus on the present moment and opportunities
for growth and forgiveness that forgiveness can bring.
“Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been any different”. Oprah Winfrey said
Even though it’s not an easy journey, I challenge you to forgive and step into the beautiful future that
you may never get to know if you choose to hold on to pain and grudges. Forgive yourself, forgive others
and step out of your history into the path of your great future.
Through coaching, I managed to choose to forgive. I let go of pain and hurt and now I experience the joy
and walk in post-forgiveness wisdom.
If you need help, reach out to us.
Sending love & joy your way.
